A long time ago, I was just going about my duties. As I remember it,
I was bending over a bag of groceries in the car and I heard God speak,
"Have no expectations of anyone on earth.
Expect only of Me."

"Ah," I thought."What a wise word! I will do that."

Now some 20 years later, I am still learning to "do" it,
by constant failure at it!

That simple command "have no expectations" probably
strikes at the heart of the
Adamic nature, the core of our ruined humanity
to presume that 'what we want' of other people
is what they should give . . . be . . . do.
The "I-am-god" nature.

When you are disappointed in a person,
do you forgive for their failure?
Not yet,
you first ask forgiveness for expectations.

Expectations are a waiting pit, an open grave of your
own digging that trips you for a long
plunge into bitterness.

Humanity cannot be trusted. Humanity cannot be holy.
The cross proves it.
If our best and highest human goodness is nothing but foul and smelly rags, fit only of death,
then how can we have any expectations of any one?

To understand that "I cannot do what I want to do" (Romans 7)
is to comprehend that no one else can either,
apart from the Life that Saves. (Romans 8)

If I "can do nothing" how wrong it is to expect
anyone else to "do right."

 
When I expect "my own idea" of what a person should do or be,
I am setting myself up to be offended -
not so much by the person's failure -
but by my own expectations!

When I do not (as Jesus) "believe" in humanity,
then I am not going to struggle unendingly with forgiveness!
Do you SEE?

Where there are no expectations, there are no offenses.
Where there are no offenses, there is no need to forgive.
 
So much of the struggle to forgive is
merely my own sin of "faith in man"
who is utterly corrupt in heart and
cannot change himself!

'My' expectations of 'you' are entrapment,
a "noble" attempt to control for selfish reasons
and therefore cruel.
'You' are God's problem and His responsibility.

'Your' expectations of 'me' are a snare,
a cruel distraction from my Focus,
who alone can be His own faithfulness WITHIN me.

God's great gift - the measure of His love -
is full and total freedom of choice.
Each of us is free to choose Him, or reject Him.
Free to be evil in Satan or good in Christ.

Entanglement happens when we wrestle with another one's
choice of darkness and choose the light for them,
against their will.
Or! Struggle with a person's choice of Light
to drag them into our beloved darkness.


Entanglement happens when we want the praise of men
more than the praise of God
and . . . work for it! (John 5:44; 12:43)

Jesus watched the rich young ruler with love, so much
love that He would not interfere with his willful choice,
deadly though it was.
Matthew 19:13

Don't be so involved that you have to forgive.

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Copyright © 2001 Martha Blaney Kilpatrick